My Last Days at the MTC

Time is beginning to wind down for us. It's amazing that my time at the MTC is almost over. It's truly been a great experience. I can't believe how much has happened. This truly is the Lord's place where all willing to learn can grow so much more than any other place. I look forward to entering the mission field and being able to use my talents the Lord has given me to help those I meet.

My teachers have really helped me a lot in improving myself and gaining confidence in my abilities. I must be doing something right when others come to me with compliments on my improvements. This past week, for my Blue Box, I practiced every night in front of Sis Low and Sis Holt. Not only did I get great feedback from them so I could improve, but I was able to practice and have the confidence needed when I performed the bible story in front of the district. This week, I had chosen to do Elijah and the Widow. I did not have a picture to show, but if I am to go outside my comfort zone, I needed to choose a story that I love. I have always known this story since I was a child, thanks to Animated Stories videos, but there were many that really didn't know the story, especially since it is found in the old testament and is only a couple of verses long. When I did my Blue Box on Saturday, my district was so nice and just was so impressed with the spirit I was able to bring through the story. My teacher stated that I move like a dancer in my sign. So, to all my dancer friends, not only do I look like a dancer and act like a dancer, my signing abilities also present me as a dancer. I got all that by spending four years with dancers helping with lighting and sound. Loves!

Also, with interpreting practice, I receive compliments about using my body language and the concepts to get the message across. I still have a bit to work on with facial expression, but I am improving. These small passing words of kindness really help me to believe I am ready for Florida. As long as I continue to improve each day, the Lord will help me and I can help those that I meet in the mission field.

For the past two weeks, our Relief Society lessons have been given from members of the General Primary Presidency: Sis Margaret S Lifferth last week and Sis Vicki F Matsumori this week. As Sisters, we are learning about the 2010 Primary theme and to help teach the children while on our mission. For "where is the symbol of our faith? In the lives of the people."

This Tuesday, we had the privilage of hearing from Elder and Sister L. Tom Perry. Much of the talk was focused of the five main points of teachings as stated in an earlier talk by Elder Holland. I simply love how Elder Perry constantly says, "Missionary Work is the life-blood of the Church." And then I never thought about it before how we are teachers all the days of our lives. From birth to death, we are teaching others while we ourselves are being taught. I thought that was really interesting. I never thought before how much a baby and a child are able to teach us, for we always think about how we can best teach them. How truly blessed we are to be upon this earth and be able to learn and progress in so many ways.

TENDER MERCY: Serving a mission really has given me the opportunity to ponder about how I have been able to grow in the gospel and in my faith in the first twenty-two years of my life. Now, as I continue to grow and be surrounded by the spirit as we prepare to invite others to come unto Christ, I continue to look inside myself and not only think how I can improve now to help support others, but what do I want to do with my life to continue onward. The Lord has given me this opportunity to begin to see what He has in store for me if I but listen and obey. I can't wait to see how much I grow in these next fifteen months. I can't wait to see how I can continue on to help His children. How grateful I am to have made the right decision to serve a mission. How grateful I am to be called as an ASL missionary to help strengthen the Church within the Deaf communities. How grateful I am to see that the Lord trusts me so much to help bring His children back into the fold of God. There are no words to express the joy I feel as I learn the language and doctrine, and imagine how I can bring others to come unto Christ. Missionary work truly is amazing! And I must end by saying, not only does missionary work bring others to God, but so does the great work of Family History and going to the Temple. It is not only helping those that are living to come unto Christ, but to help those who have already left this earth and need their work done. That is our responsibility and blessing and gift - to help all, living and dead, to return to God again.

Constant Learning

I can't believe how quickly the days go by. I really don't know what to write about because I don't feel like any time has gone by since the last time I wrote. We are all busy in the work.

We hade some great speakers for the Fireside and Devotional. Both really applied to my concerns this week. I simply love those little tender mercies. For the Sunday Fireside, Bro. Richard I Heaton, the Administrative Director of the Provo MTC spoke about teaching with the Spirit. There were three comments he made that I really liked and wrote in my journal:
~When teaching, missionaries should say, do and feel what the Lord would say, do, and feel, as if the Lord was the one teaching.
~Because it is hard to know if we are teaching by the Spirit, be ALWAYS SEEKING and NOT WORRYING.
~Payment for serving a mission is knowing how the Spirit answers prayers.
For the Tuesday Devotional, Elder Lynn G Robbins of the First Quorum of the Seventy talked to us about planning and goal setting. He has several good analogies that he used to really make the message clear. He focused on a rowboat out at sea. If we see an island, we are more likely to row and get there, then if we were only surrounded by water. Even if rough currents or strong winds are against us, we strive to reach that far off island. Then, we need to see the rowboat as a lifeboat (such as the story with Titanic when lifeboats went back to help more people who were in the water). We should help others reach the island. Don't arrive at the island by yourself.
~Who set the example for the importance of planning? If God needs to plan, how much more important is it for us to plan?
~Visions (Why?), Goals (What?), and Plans (How? When? Who? Where?) turns our hopes into actions.

I thought I'd spend some time talking about my awesome companion and district. My companion, Sis. Call, is from Bountiful, Utah (born in SLC). She has become deaf from a sickness she had as a baby. She really is amazing. Such an energetic personality and always willing to help any of us learn the language. He had some speech training when she was growing up because he had a coclear implant (it's been broken for a few years now) and her favorite thing to say is "Whatever". We all have so much fun with Sis. Call. The other Sisters in the district are amazing, also. For TRC, we usually like to switch off companions, which our teachers directs. I've been in a companionship for TRC teaching with Sis Low and Sis Holt. It's amazing what we are able to learn from each other. All of us have different qualities that somehow really fit well together and support each other. A great example is Sis. Low's and Sis. Holt's planning schedule. I am awful at planning and goal setting, so I sat in with them one Saturday when we had our planning session and they helped me learn how to better manage my time. I've got a lot of work, but with their help and that fireside talk, I'll hopefully be making some progress soon.

We have less than twelve days remaining at the MTC. Six of the ten people in our district will be leaving. 4 Sisters and 1 Elder to Florida, and a Sister to Sacramento California. That will leave our district with 1 Sister and 3 Elders for a week. Then, we hear that the next ASL district will have 15 missionaries. We are so excited for that! Something is happening with the ASL program in the Church. I'm so glad to be a part of it!

TENDER MERCY: I really feel like I am improving so much with the language. I definitely understand it better than I can sign with correct grammer, but it's exciting to see that improvement. I know I couldn't do it myself. I had three years at BYU and never felt as confident with the language than I do now with only two months of practice. This truly is the Lord's work and He is constantly helping us as missionaries prepare to teach His children. I feel I will never be the same again. I really love this opportunity to help the Deaf, to be able to support the ASL programs in the Church. Not only now, but in the future. What a wonderful blessing the Lord has given me. I am glad I chose to serve Him for these 18 months.

MTC goodness

Feel the love.

MTC District 39E

The infamous MTC map. Next stop: Fort Lauderdale, Florida.

At the Provo Temple

MTC companions! Sister Call & Sister Ellsworth.

At the curb. Last picture without a missionary badge. (Al didn't know that taking pictures at drop-off wasn't allowed.)

Some friends who met up at the Creamery to say 'goodbye' before reporting to the MTC.

Looking back to the beginning

Kristi was in Provo working with Stadium of Fire when her mission call arrived in the mail at home in Mesa, AZ. She had Rachel open and read the call while on the cell with her as she sat with Al on her then- future sister-in-law Sherry's front porch.

Rach reading the call: Florida Fort Lauderdale Mission, ASL!

Sister Ellsworth and her sisters (minus Al) on the night she was set apart as a full-time missionary.
(Rachel, Noralin, Kristi, Emily)

Leaving from Sky Harbor airport on her way to report to the MTC.

How Quickly Flees Our Time

I cannot believe how quickly times has gone by. I honestly cannot believe a week has already gone by. Next week, I should be getting my travel itinerary for Florida. We truly cannot procrastinate in this life for our time here on this earth is short.

The greatest moment of the week came from a practice teaching lesson with Sis. Low. We drew two people on the white board and practices the principles of the Restoration and Book of Mormon. I lack self confidence in my descriptive signing, so Sis. Low let me tell the First Vision. We had just practiced in class signing it with more descriptive signing (facial expressions, body language, classifiers) than vocab. The whole district had gone outside (the first time for class time) and out in a beautiful day in the shade of a big tree, we practiced telling the story of Joseph Smith when he prayed for answers and saw God and Jesus Christ appear to him. I lacked so much confidence trying to sign it to an Elder, I just couldn't do it. but when Sis. Low and I did it in the classroom, to a white board, I made myself push away my fears, and just try. A few times, I'd fumble and make a small comment, but each time, I'd get quieter, feel more calm, and I could just feel the spirit flood the room. It was amazing. I'm not saying my signing was amazing, for it need improvement, but it was another example that when we put our trust in God, our fears will slip away and our message will come through. I still lack confidence in myself at times, but I have a small prayer in my heart and I know as soon as I begin, the spirit will help lift me up and support the message I wish to teach. I love it here. I feel so blessed the Lord has called me as an ASL missionary. I want to learn all I can and be prepared for anything so when I meet a new investigator, no matter their learning level, their background, their understanding, I can be there and help them come closer unto Christ.

During our Blue Box time on Saturday, was another instance when I had practiced for two weeks to gain confidence, did a run-through with Sis Call that day, and just felt awful. I didn't think I could do it. I felt like a failure. How could I practice for two weeks and accomplish nothing. I was brought so low, but I then remembered, I was to describe my favorite bible story (Ruth). I was to express the principle that through sacrifice, the Lord will bless us with more than we had before. I prayed with all my heart for confidence in what I was about to do, and all went well. I felt good about it. I felt I had accomplished what I wished to do.

That night was extra special because one of the Elders, Elder Lingam, chose to BlueBox the Garden of Gethsemane. He struggles the most with language, but what he may lack in vocab, he makes up with through his spirit and conviction. Just to see the expression on his face, the way he presented the Atonement, was so moving. There is a moment that will be hard to forget. He showed that Christ suffered for us individually. We could see that, and each time he took on another's burden, we just yearned to take it back, to wish he didn't have to go through with it. It was truly powerful. What a gift we have been given as ASL missionaries to become the story. To really help our investigators visualize the moment we wish to share with them. There is no better language, for we express our full heart and soul for all to see.

The TRC on Friday had been focused on helping our investigator understand the Atonement and what it means to our lives. I kept approaching it different ways, helping her understand the different parts of the atonement and how the Garden of Gethsemane, the Crucifiction, and the Resurrection all had a purpose for each of us. That night, I began to read Jesus the Christ, beginning with the end of the Last Supper and on through the end. Now, I've decided to begin at the beginning and continue the study of Christ's life.

TENDER MERCY: How blessed I feel to be a missionary. To continue to grow closer to Christ. And prepare to bring others to Him. In many ways, this whole email expresses the tender mercies that God has given me this week. Each week, I attend the temple and feel closer to Him. Each teaching moment is a reminder of how we can work to help any person in any situation with any concern to realize that God is there for them. The scriptures is a wonderful tool if we remember to apply our own experiences to those found in the scriptures. All our worries and fears can be calmed through study and prayer for those brings us closer to our Father in Heaven.

Quiet, Please!

We know that the Lord speaks and understands all languages. With that knowledge, imagine how beautiful it will be to see our Lord and Savior sign. He will have the most beautiful and perfect form of sign language. Oh how I look forward to that day!

This week, we have ceased from speaking during class time. No longer is there a voice interpreter. Also, once a week, we all are to try to lock up our voices for the full day. What a challenge that will be during meal times and dorms. We plan on puting a sticky on our badge (like the Spanish missionaries do that say "No hablo ingles") and write "I can't hear you." That always makes me laugh!

Last week, I taught my first and only lesson in English. It was our first time with the Plan of Salvation. Our testimonies and personal experiences were able to really bring in the spirit, but we must work on better helping the investigaor understand the teachings. We just did a brief overview of each, and realized what's obvious for us and all new information for them. Got to keep working! And asking questions, and making commitments, and using scriptures, etc.

And now ... General Conference! Wow that was a great experience for me. All missionaries at the MTC had to gather in the gym for General Conference. It really is amazing to see everyone gathered together. I was amazed at how fast the sessions went. (I'm finding when I want to try to express a word to say, all I can do is sign it. And since signs are more based on concepts then actual English words, I can't get the right word out that I'd like to say. Just a side note.) One of the things I collected from Conference was the analogies different speakers used to describe the gospel principle. It helps me visualize and prepare to teach the Deaf so they can also visualize and understand what we teach them. Examples are:
~Sister Matsumori describing the feeling of the Holy Ghost like being wrapped secure and comfortably in a blanket;
~Elder Callister and the true gospel being a thousand piece puzzle;
~Elder Watson and temperance/self control being like tempered glass/steel;
~Sis. Dibb and it is our choice to use the safety equipment - hold to the rod;
~Elder Renlund and a mighty change of heart being a spiritual heart transplant.
I will say that the most powerful talk was by Elder Holland. How would anyone dare to dispute the Book of Mormon after that. Wow. Also, while I was reviewing my eight pages of notes (in my journal - my notebook has twelve) just now, I really liked the statement given by Elder Christofferson when he stated that society use to have people choose to act in a gentlemanly behavior but now we have to have laws to force people to behave. How uncivilized we have become. That statement really hit me. I have been thinking how back in the day, a man's word was his honor; but now, little is taken seriously. You can make a commitment with someone, and seldomly do they accomplish it in the original time frame. I sometimes wish we still had that standard, that civilized behavior of conduct. Oh how the world changes and how much it have fallen.

Sunday Night, our district decided to watch Mountain of the Lord (my favorite movie) and Sis. Low and I decided to interpret for Sis Call. That was quite an adventure. The night before at the Relief Society Broadcast, all four of us had to take turn interpreting because the closed captioning didn't work and it was too late to call an interpreter. We're really not suppose to because we haven't been trained, but we care about Sis. Call and wanted to try. What an experience. It definitely shows our progress with the language and what needs to be worked on.

The Tuesday Devotional was given by Ben B Banks, of the Emeritus Quorum of the Seventy who now helps host those countries who wish to visit with the Church. I just kept thinking of the wonderful times I had with my host families. How much I want to be able to do the same when I am older. Some of my dearest memories came from touring and talking with my host moms and dads. I want to give others that same joy I felt.

Yesturday evening, I was blessed to be able to attend a Deaf session at the temple with Sis. Call. It was wonderful! Then this morning, I went with my district for P-day. I'll say it's been a great day!

TENDER MERCY: I really like the support that I feel here at the MTC. I have my companion, roommates, district, branch, Branch President, and so many others. I know I am never alone. No matter what my worry or concern, there is someone I can turn to who will be able to give me help and support. It's so comforting. Also, I really love how the letters I receive always come at just the right times. Those from family members, friends...God gives me a tender mercy with each one. I know He loves me. That is the greatest feeling!

Forward, Pressing Forward

All continues to go well here at the MTC. I will not admit to being sick (even if I HAVE to sign because my voice is completely gone), but the MTC has gone back to no hugs or hand shakes. The joys of winter months. It is getting a bit chilly outside, but it isn't too bad yet.

I'm excited for General Conference this weekend. I'm not sure yet what we as a district will do, if we will just read closed captions, have an interpreter, or connect to the internet to watch the church interpreters. We'll find out Saturday. Also, the Sisters here at the MTC have to wait until Priesthood session to watch the General Relief Society Broadcast. That's one of my favorite meetings! It's hard to have to wait for it. I've been so tempted to sneak onto LDS.org during MDT to watch it, but I've resisted. I've had more important topics to research online than to watch a meeting we all will see in a few days.

I'm still surviving through the TRC and BlueBoxing. I have improved, but still see more that I need to work on. My biggest thing right now is to stop doubting my abilities with the BlueBox. (Have I explained why we call it BlueBox? Missionaries use to be given church images in this big blue box. Thankfully, they just came out with a handbook. Much easier to carry around! But not as many pictures. Therefore, since we act out a picture that we find in the blue box, it's BlueBoxing!) Anyways, I acted out Mary and Martha, but as some may know me to do, I start by saying I won't be very good at it...etc etc... and as everyone knows, if you doubt yourself, you won't do as good. So, my goal this next BlueBox (that isn't until next Saturday due to Conference), I am acting out my favorite bible story - Ruth. I plan on really working on it and not talking my abilities down. I can do it! Maybe it won't be an amazingly funny BlueBox like others in the district, but it will be perfect for my personality and my abilites. That's what I'm hoping and working towards.

Being Fast Sunday last week, the Mission Presidency spoke to us. I realized that Pres. J Halvor Clegg (the 2nd Counselor?) really enjoys our little ASL district. We keep running into each other, he compliments us in our signing whenever he sees us, and even sits down during meals to talk while we all eat. It's a lot of fun to see how many people come up to us because we sign. Usually at least three Elders a day will come up to us and as "How do you sign .... " It's nice to see them have fun learning something new and being willing to communicate with Sis. Call.

The fireside was amazing! Robert P Swenson, the Director of Missionary Services spoke to us and I really hope there are transcripts of MTC talks available to the public, because I really want a copy (I hear checking out the video to watch it is possible, but probably not a written transcript...). It was amazing to have my purpose in the fast was answered with so many blessings and tender mercies throughout the day; one being this talk. He used the great analogy of a kite being held up with string as it relates to following MTC rules. He focused on: Companionship, Language, Gospel Study, and Mission Call and how each of these are necessary for us here at the MTC and we do not want to cut that string. Then he ended with the statement that when these strings are tightened and intertwined together, it creates a strong rope. Also, just as flying a kite brings people so much joy, following the rules will keep ourselves high and strong to be able to move with the "breeze of the spirit". I can't explain that talk justice. It was just perfect. Truly. And, he then ended by comparing General Conference to our own King Benjamin on the tower experience where the whole world, all of God's children is able to hear from the Prophet and Apostles. I just didn't think of it that way. It left an impression.

Then, to end the Sunday, Sis. Call and I went to watch two short church films "First Vision" and "Legacy to Kirtland" (I think that was the title). Bro. and Sis. Cropper (Bro. Cropper being my teacher) came to interpret because there were no captions available. Anyways, the "Legacy to Kirtland" was filmed at the Motion Picture Studio so the whole time I watched it, it brought me back to when I worked on "Diantha's Crossing". I could pick out most, if not all the buildings and locations in the movies as to where they are found on the MPS lot. Gotta love film! It's amazing!

Devotional was given by Elder Stephen D Nadauld of the Second Quorum of the Seventy and his wife Sister Margaret Nadauld, the former General Young Women's President. So good! They discussed how God will strengthen us as missionaries and an in depth discussion on Ether 12:6 and the Trail (Trial) of Faith.

TENDER MERCY: The greatest tender mercy truthfully came from everthing that happened on Sunday. It strengthened my testimony of fasting because I could see the Lord supporting me and giving me little events that let me know He heard my prayers. Also in class I was able to share how every night I won't go to bed without writing down a tender mercy of that day. It really touched everyone and I'm glad something I learned from my mom was able to help my good friends in the district. Can't help but smile!